Why I’m Okay With the Kids Climbing into Bed With Us

I’ve always been a big believer in my kids learning to fall asleep on their own.

It all started with my first. He was a great little guy except when it came to sleep. ย By the time he was four months old, I was a tired wreck of a mom and that’s when we sleep trained him.

When my second came along, I was blessed with another non-sleeper. Even though I eventually sleep trained her as well, it has always been a constant battle, even now at the age of five.


I think one of the reasons is because I wanted them to fall asleep on their own. Yes I co-slept when they were newborns, but after sleep training, I was adamant that they fall asleep on their own. This was really hard to enforce when it came to grandparents because they had a really hard time with it.

But over the last year, my thoughts and ideas on the kids’ bedtime isย changing. Maybe it’s because they are getting older. At age five and seven, they aren’t babies or toddlers anymore. They are getting older and it’s happening fast. I want to make the most of this awesome time with them.

Soon enough, they are not going to want to climb into bed with us, they are going to want hang out with their friends more than their parents and let’s face it, we are not going to be the center of their universes.

So until then, I’m okay when they want to climb into bed with us in the middle of the night. Until then, I’m happy to lay down with them in their beds after I tuck them in.

It’s actually the time when the best conversations happen, when the kids all of a sudden remember stuff about their day that they forgot to tell me when I asked, we giggle about funny things and we cuddle. It’s only a few extra minutes each night but each time I feel like it’s bonding us ย and bringing us closer together.

Most of the time they are still awake when I leave the room. On occasion my daughter may fall asleep while I’m beside her but I’m fine with that too. She’s so happy when I’m there with her, her arms around me and a smile on her face.

They are not going to want it forever, so until they do, I am happy to oblige.

13 thoughts on “Why I’m Okay With the Kids Climbing into Bed With Us

  1. We totally do the same with our kids. They always want to sleep with us so we instituted weekend sleep overs. Each kid gets either Friday or Saturday night with us. so whenever they beg to sleep with us, we tell them to just wait until the weekend. It gives them something to look forward to and we don’t have arguments about it during the week.

  2. Oh man I totally get you.. there are days I want endless cuddles but then middle of the night sessions when I have to go to work the next day are the WORST! I’m so tired… I love my sleep way too much!

  3. Totally agree with you! My daughter is only 16 months and I didn’t initially plan on cosleeping but it just happened. I always have people asking me when she will be moving to her own bed but frankly my husband and I enjoy having her. Before we know it she ll be asking for her own room with a lock!

  4. I feel the same way. I don’t want to be sorry that I didn’t enjoy being with them more. I don’t give a crap about what doctors day is best for children. The best thing for a child is to feel loved and cherished. By the way, I am a man.

  5. I’m the opposite. My son slept in his own bed until about age 3, but then started coming into my bed on occasion. I was fine with it then, but he’s 7 now and in my bed every night. I’d love to find a way to keep him in his bed, but it happens so often now I don’t even wake up when he comes in. I just find him there in the morning, when he’s laying partially on me, resulting in a back ache all day. I know he’ll grow out of it eventually, but it’s one thing I wish would happen sooner.

  6. I know exactly what you mean Salma! I completely relate and have been doing the same these days. Crazy to think it was already 7 1/2 years ago now we were at stroller fitness classes!

  7. It’s so funny that you wrote this post now – my younger daughter is almost 3 and we go through extensive back and forths to get her to sleep on her own and it almost always ends in me scolding her and then she stays put and falls asleep. sometimes it seems infinitely easier to just cuddle with her!

  8. I have a 3 boys. 5, 7 and 9. They never stay in their own beds. Ever. I put them go bed and cuddle with them every night and have those amazing conversations and bonding moments. Sure, l miss out on plenty of “me” time but, as you say…its all temporary. This will all end. And I’ll miss it. But I’ll admit, I end up playing musical beds. I end up crushed. I wake up feeling disoriented. My body hurts. My brain is foggy. Sometimes I’m mad at them for just never ever being able to let me sleep! Thankfully I work from home and can nap during the day. So I try to constantly enjoy even the discomfort. One day I’ll be an old man in a bed and I’ll miss having my babies look for me in the middle of the night. So I suck it up and soldier on! And my three lads think I’m the greatest pop on the planet. Worth the sore back and saggy eyes…

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